Reasons I don't want a dog

1. they rip apart down comforters and leave the room with a fine dusting of feathers
2. they never learn to clean up after themselves. A child will eventually learn to poop in the toilet; a dog never will
3. they rub their faces in the poo of other dogs.
4. they lunge at cats, dragging you with them and risking back injury when you (or Tyka, as the case may be) slip on wet pavement
5. they enjoy sitting on furniture and leaving behind a gift of hair
6. slobber

All of this from witnessing Tyka dogsit. Okay, he wasn't much of a slobberer. I'm projecting from dogs I've sat on.

That said, some dogs are nice. I could handle a dog if need be. I would make that sacrifice. But I would NEVER get one for myself and proceed to treat it like a child. A child that never grows up.

I think it's time for bed if I start blogging about DOGS for crying out loud. Do I have nothing better to say? No liturgical gems? No snide remarks?

I do have this. A confession. I suspect I may be a mean person. No, I know this. Or I act like a mean person even though I'm well intentioned. How is this possible? I wish it weren't. But I am. The original jessmonster. I'm mean, especially, to people I love. I'm mean to everyone, really, but I think I notice it more with people I'm close to because it doesn't make sense. Just mean in little ways. Or maybe it's that I'm not always comfortable being affectionate? So I'm mean instead?

I really need to stop now. We're bordering on talking about emotions here. Unacceptable. Also, I'm asking too many questions.

PS - Spellcheck thinks "jessmonster" should be changed to "jejuneness." Um.